Bismillahi r-Rahmani r-Rahim
Raising a child isn’t just about getting them through school or making sure they get good jobs. In Islām, parenting is far deeper. It’s a sacred trust—one that could either elevate you on the Day of Judgment or become a heavy burden. Mawlānā Shaykh Muḥammad ‘Ādil ar-Rabbānī’s reminder from the Akbaba Dergah in Istanbul captures it perfectly: raise your children on the way of Allāh جل جلاله.
The Trust of Children
Children are not your possessions—they’re a trust (Amanah) from Allāh جل جلاله. As stated in the Qur’ān:
“Your wealth and your children are but a trial.” (Qur’ān 64:15)
They are both blessings and tests. How you handle them says everything about your faith and trust in Allāh جل جلاله.
Parenting with Purpose
The Influence of Tarbiyah (Islamic Upbringing)
Tarbiyah is more than education. It’s the full moral, emotional, and spiritual upbringing. It means nurturing a child’s soul just as much as their mind and body. From the first words a baby hears, Islām should echo through the home.
Teaching Tawḥīd from an Early Age
Instilling the Love of the Prophet ﷺ
To follow Islam is to follow the Sunnah of Rasūlullāh ﷺ. Teach your kids stories of his mercy, his humor, his love for children. Let them see the Prophet ﷺ as a hero—not just a figure in a book. Read Seerah stories together. Use play and storytelling to ignite their imagination.
Balancing Discipline and Freedom
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“Khayru l-‘Umoori l-Wasat”
“The best of matters is the middle way.”
Too much freedom, and they lose themselves. Too much restriction, and they rebel. Islām teaches us to walk the middle path—correct with mercy, guide with wisdom, and love without spoiling.
Avoiding Extremes
The Role of Parents as Murabbī (Spiritual Guides)
Parenting is a form of spiritual mentorship. You’re the first teacher your child will ever have. They will follow your actions, not your words. If you pray, they’ll pray. If you lie, they’ll lie. If you seek Allāh, they will too.
Living What You Preach
Protecting Children from Shayṭān’s Influence
We live in a time where Shayṭān doesn’t even need to whisper—he broadcasts 24/7. From phones to cartoons to peer pressure, the attacks are non-stop. It’s your job to shield their hearts, and more importantly, teach them how to protect themselves.
Creating a Safe Islamic Environment
Make your home a place where Allāh is remembered. Play Qur’ān in the background. Have a space for prayer. Celebrate Islamic milestones. Encourage Dhikr and make Dū‘ā together. Let Islām be felt—not just preached.
Building Identity and Self-Knowledge
As Ibn al-‘Arabī said:
“Who knows himself knows his Lord.”
Teach your child to know who they are—not just academically, but spiritually. If they discover their purpose, they will find Allāh جل جلاله.
Long-Term Rewards of Raising Righteous Children
When a parent dies, their deeds end—except for three things. One of them?
A righteous child who prays for them.
That child continues to earn you rewards long after you’ve left this world. Their prayer, their charity, their Da‘wah—all of it traces back to you.
Modern Day Applications
Conclusion
Raising your children on Allāh’s جل جلاله way isn’t easy—but it’s worth it. In this stormy world, your home must be the Ark of Nūḥ عليه السلام. A safe haven. A place where the love of Allāh, the Prophet ﷺ, and the teachings of Islām are lived and loved. Do your part—and leave the rest to Allāh جل جلاله.
